If you get the Veer catalog, your name and address gets inkjetted onto the back at the printer. But there's also room to inkjet other stuff. In the past, we've printed marketing messages and ad copy. But we don't think people read it. So instead, we're printing something else: poetry.
The printer gives us 4 lines of 30 characters (including spaces and punctuation). Enter your "inkjet haiku" - 4 lines of 30 characters about anything. We'll print the best ones on the back of our monthly catalogs, and give you credit. Fame and fortune will surely follow.
Note: Your "inkjet haiku" must have 30 characters on each line, and 4 lines in total. Spaces and punctuation count so get down.
See our first winner. Note: flattery isn't essential, just originality. Enter your haiku here (as a comment on this post).
“
Thanks, Monica! Although we love the sentiment, your haiku wouldn't qualify because it must have 30 characters (exactly) per line. Sorry if that wasn't clear. (See the pop-up image.)
”
“
Ok - this is harder than it sounds. Here is my first attempt.
I saw this one font from Veer-
With a serif swept and severe.
The ascent not short of bliss-
A font I can not dare dissmiss
”
“
Geez, more flattery! It doesn't *have* to be about us, you guys... thanks though.
”
“
Second attempt.
Makes no sense - and no reference to Veer.
I need some more coffee.
The crayons I eat are so good-
Much better sub-standard food.
Some can tell me not to do it-
I down a whole box and chew it.
”
“
short colored daisies
on a sun-lit surreal hill
call it;
a punch to your pupils
”
“
The serif fell off my font, my photos are looking flat.
My portfolio case is a bag from the Piggly Wiggly, oh that won't do.
Maybe wearing a t-shirt that reads Lorem Ipsum, might help.
What's a designer to do? Oh yeah, Veer to the rescue!
”
“
OK, you guys are really good at saying nice things (thanks) but really bad at counting characters!
4 lines. 30 characters (including spaces). You have to use them all! No more, no less.
Just like a haiku, you can't break the rules...
”
“
Jim Coudal ups the ante with this sweet entry:
WHEN CHOOSING NICE PROPER TYPE
A MONOSPACED FONT AT THE READY
PRESS THE CAP-LOCK IF YOU WANT
AND MAKE IT LOOK REAL INKJETTY
”
“
Thumb me, plumb me, all pretty
Halftone, bitmap, all the same
Don't make no diff. as long as
Y'all get on yo' bestest game.
”
“
Stock photos: flora and fauna,
women (or whimsy) and kittens.
Type: character, letter, fonts
or whatever. And the T-shirts!
”
“
veer's challenge a hard first
four lines total- all in verse
thirty characters per one line
no less no more - that is fine
”
“
NO SERIFS ON MY FONTS TODAY OH
FLAT PHOTOS THAT ARE NOT SAVVY
LOREM IPSUM BLINKING IN MY EYE
OH VEER HELP ME I KNOW YOU CAN
”
“
When the red planet comes near
this August, it will not be as
large as the moon to the naked
eye. Who told you that anyway?
”
“
It's easy to write a bad haiku
A great one, well it is not so
This li'l hack will have to do
Because I'm no Edgar Allan Poe
”
“
A mind is too mined to produce
enough juice, ear can't deduce
an original word in a world w/
-out Seuss. Swiss Army Spitoon
”
“
4x7: An Inkjet Haiku
The tree falls and the ink dries
and the postman wakes to drive to his drop
and by nightfall we hold them
bent bowed or banded - pictures and prose
”
“
I have but one mad little wish
never ever, I wish, never ever
put that font in front of me!!
Comic Sans is never polite. :(
”
“
All night, whispering crickets
Gossip about the new neighbor.
Until the flash of white teeth
Shoos them in the starry grass
”
“
Typography for the word haiku.
Be it Alma, Pea or Font Bureau
To find you need not be a seer
Simply proceed on over to Veer
”
“
MY HAIKU IS NOT TRULY A HAIKU.
IT CONTAINS TOO MANY LINES AND
TOO MANY SYLLABLES. GOOD THING
IT DOESN'T HAVE TO RHYME, TOO.
”
“
I have more books about design
on my shelf than I have client
s. and I am not a good enough
poet to make coffeehouse cash.
”
“
Veer is so colorful and unique
oh my how I love to take a peek
in the fine catalog every week
Veer makes designs oh so sheik
”
“
Four lines & thirty characters
Makes it hard to get your idea
Across. But a picture is worth
A thousand words - go to Veer!
”
“
F. Goudy said anyone who could
letterspace in lowercase would
steal sheep, but it?s tempting
at times. Who?s that bleating?
”
“
I am making plans for Nigel to
take this contest with his ode
to one Mister Frederic William
the American typographic icon.
”
“
I feel hemmed in; trapped by t
his small space that I have to
live and express... in the end
how will I spend my last line?
”
“
Superb plans & verses, Grant!
Goudy helps remind me there is
more to this than just staring
at a TV, and holding a potato.
”
“
Nigel, our Goudy haiku poetry
has continued on quite nicely
What other phrase could still
be related, except thank you.
”
“
You?re welcome! So quickly do
you reply, it?s almost speech.
So tell me, are you with Veer,
or are you simply a passer-by?
”
“
Indeed with Veer I am employed
each day reappearing at my job
Working with fonts, I do enjoy
and over a desk creativity lob
”
“
They make good veer
that they put mouth
into the mind to
your face!
”
“
Thanks for the chat Grant. Now
It is time to let others joust
these lists. I will watch, and
await the next catalogue. Wow!
”
“
Hilarious, Grant & Nigel. You guys win hands down...
”
“
Thought I'd try my hand at a limerick....
There once was a font at veer
That filled my eyes with cheer
Just to buy it, then to try it
Perfect for setting King Lear!
”
“
tentacles of spite
wrapped up like a sushi roll
squid of jealousy
warning: hot contents
just when you least expect it
volcano season
fill extra characters with spaces
”
“
CUBICLE LAND, SO BORING & BLAND
TO REMAIN AWAKE; VEER I INTAKE
LOST IN THOUGHT OF FANCY FONTS
THE DAYS LONG HOURS; DEVOURED.
”
“
Here's mine. It's so frustrating when you're just one character off and you have to change it!!! :) These are fun though.
Color management, fonts galore
Graphics, photos, logos & more
They may cause others to snore
It is what designers live for!
”
“
We -hamsters in cubicles watch
-the wheels of a creative mind
churn upon ungreased cogs, and
flail like fish on boats deck.
”
“
But what does it all mean you
may well ask. Crunching cogs?
Fish out of water and hamster
confinees? Do any of us know?
”
“
Writing poetry is fairly tough
when there's a lovely sandwich
in my hand. Especially writing
something not about sandwiches
”
“
Yes! Finally, a haiku about sandwiches!
”
“
What does it mean we may ask!?
It means that we're on a task.
Picking colors, pics and fonts
allowing us our social jaunts!
”
“
Starved for original thoughts
To breathe and feed upon,
This money makes me hungry
Especially when it?s gone.
”
“
Stacking the deck. Hoping this is for the fall catalog.
Down the withered leaf spirals
alighting on his fallen friend
In warmth this ream sows ideas
to your lush mind; flourishing
”
“
Let's all get reborn. Floating
through the cloudy haze that I
have always just watched alone
Come and dive into it with me.
”
“
White space, wasted
trails fluid ink
wisdom, migraines
we hope, we think
”
“
Hi... me again.
What better way to kill a few
minutes on a damp Friday morn
than by pinching more stanzas
amid this creative brainstorm
”
“
What better way? Perhaps to be
Holding a golf club instead of
A mouse, with a longer horizon
Than a glowing screen... Fore!
”
“
Sorry Nigel, I don't play the
game of clubs, ball and green
Especially when there is rain
wreaking havoc upon the scene
”
“
a stroll thru artistic foliage
a jungle of svelte typography
words like chimps with chatter
surround me with feverish glee
Ok, so the second line is one letter short. can't figure out how to substitute without loosing the meaning. I could argue that it still lives up to spirit of Haiku, and hey, it does fit in the required space.
”
“
Cowboys make good type
Despite contrary hype
As they gallop on virgin 24 #
With ink spats juicy and ripe!
”
“
Get Da da da..................
..........dowwwwwwwwwww.......
...............nnnnnnnnnnnn...
...............naaa na na NAH!
”
“
Yeah! Finally some guttural, street-level haiku.
”
“
designers who rant about those
who do not know the difference
tween arial & helvetica should
learn what makes a real haiku!
Said with tongue firmly planted in cheek - don't want to piss anyone off. As someone who actually is serious about writing haiku, I just couldn't HELP myself! (And I DID follow the guidelines! ;-D )
”
“
Mid August, Edmonton Alberta &
yes I know we?re way north but
that is no excuse for the loud
whisper of autumn heard today.
”
“
a winter wind cuts forest tree
bare branches cannot defend it
against time, weather, and man
you now grasp it in your hands
”
“
Wow, thanks for all the great entries! Because we've had so many good ones, I'm going to choose 10 for the September Veer catalog. I've chosen 9 - I need one more. (After all, if we just printed *one* winning entry, we may as well just print it normally instead of inkjetting it at the last minute - know what I'm sayin'?)
The haikus will be printed randomly on the back of the catalog, so you may have to trade catalogs with friends or borrow them from others to get a catalog with the one you like on it.
OK, I need one more entry. Who's got a good one?
”
“
Can I look pretty in pictures?
Will you look pretty in print?
Type and image are waiting here
In prepress with ink and glint
I like my first one better, but this one has promise. :)
”
“
[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[
[[[[[[[[[[[[[haiku]]]]]]]]]]]]
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”
“
Ooooh, conceptual/concrete poetry, Jeffray - I like.
”
“
We have 10 winners! I'll close the comments now.
Thanks for your entries... watch the September Veer catalog - and this web site - to see if yours was chosen.
We'll hold another round of the contest for the October catalog - keep watching The Skinny.
”
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“
too many images
never enough
it is just that when it gets tough
everything seems so much better
in a Veer filled world
”