Above are the contents of a package recently sent to me by a ne’er-do-well friend currently living in Bangkok. For your convenience I have numbered the contents of this mysterious mailing. Let’s explore, shall we?
1. A lovely silk scarf from a Thai market. So far, so good.
2. An illustrated bookmark/coupon for a store apparently called Goose. This is the best name ever. I want to open my own business just so I can steal it.
3. Brightly decorated envelope, sure to arouse suspicion at Customs.
4. An article on how to improve my bowling skills, neatly clipped from a magazine. I do not bowl.
5. Card advertising an exhibit for a Shanghai-based photographer. Unfortunately I missed the show by one month and several thousand miles.
6. Slightly suspicious-looking candy.
7. Book promising me a fruitful and harmonious life. Book was apparently purchased from a man wandering on the beach. Actually, that's how I acquired most of my library.
8. Coasters(?) advertising a Thai sex workers advocacy group that my aformentioned friend was volunteering with. A definite conversation starter for guests!
I am nerviously awaiting my next mailing, due to arrive from Australia. Who knows what novelties will be uncovered in the land o’ Vegemite?
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um, exKuze me, but that book was given to me by a monk and a former monk while standing in a temple parking lot in chiang mai thailand at 9 pm on a saturday night. Actually. They were trying to HELP fer goddsakes. You should really read the part about how to be a good employee. I think you could learn some things.
(I've just had coffee for only the second time in 7 years. i'm a bit much maintenant.)
PS i'm already planning my Oz mailout...in it i'll reveal the dirty slang word used for vegemite. but not a moment sooner.
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